Still Learning

Even after loosing 55 lbs. I still find myself using food as a crutch. This week I let go and ate what I wanted. I've been sitting here grading papers and thinking about why....I have two reasons. I think. One is I'm very stressed with school this year and this week and last have been riddled with headaches, so I let myself let the headaches take over. In the past year I refused to "EAT" them away. Not this week. I wanted to eat and eat I did. Sunday I rode my mountain bike some 30 miles. It was exhausting. I fell and busted up my knee. Monday morning the scale was high. I let go of reason( yes, my second reason) and got sad about it( I know better- muscle weighs more at first)...by Thursday the scale was way down. But in the meantime I had let myself eat and eat and eat. But you know, I can't just remember to not let the scale rule my life. All I can do is let tomorrow be better and learn from today. I'm still learning. 

2012 A New Year

Been slacking on the ole blog. Once again school - my job seems to zap the life out of me! That's ok- it's all  just very necessary as things have a way of falling into place. 

So many things are changing~Parker for one is really growing up. He's working and finishing his senior year and doing a lot of mountain biking. He's saving his money for a new bike and is excited about it. 

Husband and his work opened a new restaurant- a source of anxiety and problems! Me- I'm the same. I feel like I've never been a better teacher - but I'm really putting a lot of time into getting there. Been doing a lot of bike riding. That has become a small obsession. We did 2 long 65+ mile rides this year..a 25 mile ( which we raced the whole way) and on most weekends I've been doing a 25+ mile ride.  We went snow skiing and I skied with ease. So much easier when you don't weigh a ton!!!! But my weight hasn't changed in a long time so last week I recommitted to WW. It's hard as food still continues to comfort me. Now it's just healthy food that does! But it's a journey and what else have I got to do. My goal for 2012 is to continue to think positively, use gratitude as my guide and enjoy all aspects of life!!! 

After our 65 mile ride- we are holding metals. Look who is still the fattest. LOL 

Gratitude

Time for gratitude. Time to open up to the Universe and let possibilities flow in! Live to learn~

I'm so grateful for- 


My family
Our closeness
Our unity 
My dogs and their unending love
Heat of Summer
Summer
Vacations
Being active
Riding my bike 
Riding my bike far
Walking
Possibilities
Fish Tacos
Friends
Lunch out
Margaritas
Strawberries
Music
This house
This time off
My job
My health
An open mind

Fifty Pounds Ago

Today I asked hubby to go ride bikes. He's been wanting to ride the trail from Valero to where ever it ends. We started at 10 AM. I was worried it would be too hot. It was! Turns out there are 12 miles of trail that are finished. We ended up at Ingram Park Mall! Met a wino there ( he called himself that). Awesome. 

But it was more than a ride for me. It was a challenge and I met it. I wanted to prove that I could ride and keep up with my husband who rides much more than I do. I think I did ok. Even he admitted it was hard. That made me feel good. It wasn't that hard, but it was hard. I could have gone much further if I had water and stopped. So I know I can do longer rides. I would have never thought 50 lbs ago I could ride 20 miles much less 24. Life is good when you take care of yourself. And I'm learning! 

Summer Days are Slowly Melting Away

I like teaching, but I ...I ...I.....I love summer. I don't especially like the first two or three weeks where I'm still trying to figure out how to not work. I can't relax and don't know what to do with all the time. But about this time every summer, I slip into summer mode and things feel right. The one thing that feels right is my precious time with Parker.

Probably the best thing about this summer has been Parker. He turned 17!!! 

And sometimes he even likes hanging out with us!!! 

One thing that Parker likes is his friends. 

Which means I get to hang out with his friends. 

I like his friends. I think after teaching for so long, I'm more comfortable with kids than anyone else. I absorb their enthusiasm. I absorb their laughter. I wish I had their energy and lack of fear! I know the days I have with Parker are slowly ticking away. I will miss these days. My days will be filled with something else, but nothing will replace all the summers I get with my best kid. So while these days are melting away before me I am so conscious of how precious and amazing each and every day is and I'm so grateful for this time and life. 

Hernia=OUCH

What was I thinking? I have 8 puncture wounds in my belly. No wonder I put this off for so long. On the flip side. I read and made some notes for my classroom notebook project! Since I can't move much, at least I can be productive. I got 15 punctures in my leg for the veins...they hurt less. In a couple of weeks I should be good to go!

The Summer of Repair

My goal this summer is to get the things on my body fixed that are fixable. I'm working on my varicose veins. UGH...Below is a "before" picture taken several years ago. It's obvious which leg is affected. Now that I've lost the weight, I've been working on getting them removed. The weight loss has make them protrude even more.

The process in expensive and very painful. This picture is the after effects of the larger vein on the top of the back of my thigh. It looks way better now! But took a long time for the bruisig to go away. I recently had the veins removed from my calf and I'm not happy at all with the rusults. I go in today for another treatment and in a couple weeks will post the "after " results. 

Tomorrow I go in to have my herniated belly button fixed. I've had this for 17 years- since the birth of my big baby- Parker! I'm so dreading it. But it's the summer of repair and time to get it fixed and move on! 

Patience

Bring on Summer!!! 

Yeah...that's Parker jumping off the trampoline and into the pool. I know...not too safe...but it's summer after all!!

Which brings me to the topic of this post. I like walking in the morning. I like starting the day on a productive note and having the walk give me the energy to do something productive. In the past summer was getting up slowly..drinking coffee...getting on the computer...getting back in bed..etc. 


I so want to be more alive and active! So far I am. It's amazing being part of a lifestyle change. I think I'm slowly morphing into something new, different, and better. As I walked this morning I tried to think about having patience. Walking Jack is what got me active, but he never used to smell everything like he does now. He's more comfortable with the walk and wants to check things out and I'm ready to go fast fast fast. I've got to have patience. 


Just like with a lifestyle change. It must come slowly. It must be a constant change though. It must not happen occasionally, but constantly. For instance, I've learned that I can't just eat well 5 days a week and expect any weight loss. It's got to be 7 days of being on target. I can't walk a couple days a week. It's got to be constant. It takes patience to see results, but when you do...it's worth it. As they say...patience is a virtue..and virtue won't hurt you! 

Hoppy Easter and Goals

Happy Easter 

Sundays I like to reflect on the week and think what I might do better the following week.  This past week was wrecked with my headaches. Lately they have been coming on at about noon and they are intense. I get a prescription for 9 pills and it's usually plenty. This month I'm down to five and I still have two weeks to go. I don't like getting so low. Eating was terrible. Well, actually it was terrible three of the four days.I've got to be more consistent. If I'm only consistent part of the time, it won't make a difference. I need to be consistent each day for WW to work. I walked ONLY 12 miles, a record low. I did mountain bike on Saturday which translate to 2 hours of biking, but I have no idea how many miles. 

It's that simple. I think. Ha. Well new week better results! 

These Are a Few of My Favorite Things

 I LOVE SPRING....yeah it's pretty much my favorite season beside summer. I think spring means I've made it through another year. I measure my years on school years not calendar years. LOL 

Here are some favorite views I am privileged to see every day!!! Happy Spring~ 

Texas Red Bud

 Yeah, even Parker!! 

My Molly

Cedar Oak 

 Twisted and Tangled